By mid-September I was really concerned that 2018 would be a three-peat. I didn't see my goals as overly lofty: a ring muscle-up and a 115# snatch. The prerequisites were there. Yes, I am a 43-year-old mother who doesn't come from a gymnastics or Olympic lifting background, but I am confident performing similar movements and lifts. I just knew that 2018 was going to be my year. I have focused on developing my coaching skills as well as growing as an athlete. Staying in my lane and not comparing myself to others has been huge for me. If I just focus on giving my best effort on any given day, I can celebrate the victories of others and myself with a glad and sincere heart. I try (not always successfully) not to make excuses. I try to celebrate small feats and personal wins and unexpected achievements by myself and others. In fact, I've tried to eliminate every expectation that isn't about giving today's best effort from both my performance and the performances of my fellow athletes in every class that I coach or take. I've been working hard. Why were my goals so darn ELUSIVE?
Turns out they weren't all that elusive after all. I just had to wait for them to ripen before I could reap the fruits. I liken goal-chasing to gardening. When I contemplate my own very sad backyard garden (that suffered from neglect and Bull Terrier abuse all summer while I was busy tending other areas of my life) I can put the whole thing in focused perspective. We have all heard colloquialisms like "reap what you sow" and "planting the seed." The analogy goes so much deeper and I think it's worth cogitating.
I put the seed down when I wrote the goals on the board back in 2016, and then I reseeded in 2017 and 2018. I didn't give much thought to the soil I was throwing my goals in until recently. Once you plant a seed and it germinates, little baby roots start sprouting from the radicle and they are reaching out to gather nutrients from their surroundings. If the dirt isn't healthy and rich in nutrients, the sprout won't thrive. Think of the people you surround yourself with on a daily basis as that soil. People with whom you have healthy relationships of substance help you grow. You know you can rely on those people to fortify you and help you to establish a sturdy root system. I've said before that my people are the best people and I'll say now that I'm incredibly lucky to have the best damn dirt around. I don't even think they'll be offended that I likened them to dirt! The people that I have the pleasure to train with on a daily basis support me inside the gym and out. They put up with my temper tantrums and they celebrate my victories and allow me to celebrate theirs. They offer advice and want to help. They don't belittle accomplishments. We all work to make each other better. We laugh, we joke, we dance (mostly that's just me), and we have real conversations. I have awesome dirt.
One of the main things that I didn't know I was lacking was sunshine. Plants use photosynthesis to convert sunlight into energy used to sustain life functions. Fuel. Food. Nine weeks ago the leader of my dirt tribe, The Great Bearded One (a.k.a. "Punk" and "Charles" and "#Chuckfit") started telling some of my grubby buddies and me how much of what to eat. I've had my moments of food freakishness over the years, but I've never tracked what I ate or weighed what I ate or cared how much the scale said I weighed. I've never needed to because I have always been healthy by medical standards. I agreed to try things his way--y'all have no idea how huge that is--in the hopes that I would notice some benefits in the performance department. Boy have I ever! Not only have I noticed positive changes in my performance, prepping all my meals for the week has given me more time to soak up some actual sunshine. And I can take pictures of all my pretty food to share!
The other thing that was holding me back until recently was a fear of the rain. Not every day can be full of sunshine. When the clouds roll in and the sky is dark as far as the eye can see, I find it very hard to brace for impact and weather the storm. I would rather put a cloche over my tender shoots and protect them from the onslaught of the falling sky. I have a fear of failure. I would rather hide under a glass case than get pelted by painful drops of experience that cause me to bend under the weight. I would rather avoid being quenched with a life-giving gift of lessons learned than risk drowning by root rot. Sometimes it's easier to say you've had enough for the day than to try one more time. Sometimes it's easier to be tired than to try to process another cue or hear the disappointment loosely disguised in the encouraging words from those around you. Sometimes I am afraid too much rain will erode all my amazing soil.
Earlier I mentioned that I've been working hard on developing myself as a coach and an athlete. I guess I've also been honing my goal-gardening skills. I've been trying really hard to soak up all the sunshine and be thankful for all the rain. I've been trying to appreciate my soil and not worry that it will wash away from me but instead will work to keep me planted firmly where I belong. On September 28th I snatched 115#. Less than a week later on October 3rd I got a ring muscle-up. I was able to cross off both my goals within the first two weeks of fall. Harvest celebration indeed. Time to plan for next year's garden.
Please don't look at me in this video. It's all about the amazing dirt.
